I wanted to thank you all for your comments and concern. Last week was one of the busiest weeks I've had in a long time and I just needed a break to regroup! But I'm back today.
And today I am remembering my Dad. On October 28, 1995 my father passed away. There is not a day that goes by that I don't think of him. My father's nick name was Tex. I think my mother told me that he got his nickname because when he was a little boy he used to deliver newspapers by horse. Cape Cod is not notorious for naming their children Tex. The only person I ever heard only call him by his name, Allen, was my grandmother. :)
What a cute little boy!
I've posted this picture before but I just love his smile.
This is how I remember my father looking. It's no surprise where my big round cheeks come from.
My father had lung cancer and just a few months after my wedding in 1995 he died. This picture of him looks so sickly. He lost so much weight. It's not how I see him when I think back on him.
I have dreams about him all the time. In my dreams I know that he has died yet he is always there. When I first found out I was pregnant with Tim I had a dream that I saw him and told him and he told me that he already knew.
Tim was born with club feet and the first trip to the hospital in Boston was a difficult time for me. I remember sitting in Boston traffic worrying, and saying a little prayer. I asked for some sort of sign to let me know that everything would be alright with Tim. I looked up at the truck ahead of us and there was a sticker on the back that said "Tex". I knew then that Tim would be OK.
There was another time when Tim was VERY VERY sick and in intensive care at the hospital which was a very frightening time for our family. One day I felt my father by Tim's side. It was such a powerful feeling.
I knew that if I was to ever have a son he would be given my father's name. Timothy Allen was born just shy of three years after my father's death.
So, today I remember him, miss him and love him very much.